I am lost. Lost in the middle of the field. I hate coming down for rugby training when everyone have already warm up and started training. I feel lost and i don;t know what to do. I don't get much interaction with the freshies (like i will if i am there)and i haven't been training much ever since the holiday ended. I never train my basics and whatever stuff. Ever since the freshies came in, the atmosphere seems to be a lot more different. Everyone was weird. I wonder y.This sunday, i wonder how are we going to win with not much bonding in our team and with my limited skills. Everyone seems to be improving except me. I don;t wanna drag the whole team down. Sometimes, i felt that the chemisty between him and her is good. Maybe very good. I am slowly leading myself to think in a bad bad way and follwing a bad bad path. I am afraid chances are, i am actually the third party which me myself don know until now. I can't control the way my mind is thinking. I juz couldn't help it. Seeing you and her makes me feel a bit sad because i think you both really suits each other. You two should be together. My pea brain is sick now. Y i am thinking that way? Got to give myself two tight slaps to wake me up. (no way i am going to do tat)
I had been thinking of ways to let me think of creative and freah ideas. I thought of banging my head against the wall until my brain flow out from the crack. But after given several tots, i gave up. Its a stupid idea. I also thought of borrowing brain from the others , others whose brain are more functioning than mine . But in the end, no one would sacrifice for me. I thought of drinking one dozen of chicken essense to make my brain function more quickly and well again. But the thought of drinking one dozen of it will surely makes me puke, i gave up. I thought of searching the "on" switch on my brain because i am sure that my brain is not functioning well (maybe not even functioning) but i guess its a lame idea. I am totally lack of fresh ideas!!TOTALLY lost in this complicated and meaningless world.You do everything becuase of an reason. You need reason for everything. Life is full of reasons and excueses.
